Saturday, March 31, 2007
i dun understand.i rili dun understand lahysd u all left me in a farking pissed mood.im sry i shudnt b saeing all tis cus its ovr.bt cn u at least spare a tot 4 me?doesnt mean tt i kp quiet tt means im feeling nth.doesnt mean i dun wan 2 sae means im a coward.im jz tolerating all tis okay.im not a fool.nt an idiot.i oso have feelings 2 lyk all of u lah.b4 recess.i wan copy e ws.ya its correct if i copy tt tym i wun b able 2 listen 2 wt tcher saeing.bt pls lah.recess i go buy food 4 u all u tink i gt tym 2 copy?okay nvm.thn recess.orders came.actually ws going down wid weizhen bt ysd she dowan go down.i dn lyk 2 go down alone o wt lah.i dowan 2 go down alone.it makes me feel stupid cans.n there i ws holding e slip of orders n asking hu wud go down wid me.n evry1 downa 2 go down jz bcus they DUN feel lyk going down.wt about me lehx.u tink i lyk 2 take orders frm u all?i oni dun mind loh.n i stil gt hw 2 copy leh.thn u all ask me go here go thr asking ppl.thn lata whn no1 wan 2 go down,sakshi ask me pei her go council table.sry nt i dowan 2 go.bt i jz quit council i dowan 2 b xtra thr.i noe u r trying 2 find waes 2 make me feel more at home bt i jz dowan 2 trouble u.thn in e end wq go down wid me lohx.aft we buy food liao,i wnt up.i noe deb care cus she asked me wt happen.i guess she knew it from e lk on my face.im sry i noe i shudnt haf bhaved lidat.bt if u put urself in MY shoes,hw will u feel?is nt i dowan 2 buy 4 u.bt its lyk.tink tis wae lah,if u all take turns 2 go down wid me,1 wk oni nd 2 go down 1 tym o less ryt.n its nt as if im asking u all 2 do sth illegal o wt lah.aniwaes dun take tis seriously lahx.its ovr n im okay nw.im nt blaming anibody.sry i jz had 2 sae it out nw cus i dowan 2 kp it insid until e lst min thn i sae evrytink out.n thr's a need 2 apologize 2 those im being attituded 2..yeah tis few wks i've been feeling depressed lah.s i jz vent attitude on u ppl.sry guys.its lyk sumtyms,i dun tink ani1 understands me..cus evrytink tt they sae,in e end im stil left alone 2 face it.ysd nyt i locked myself in e toilet n cried.cried until i felt muchmuch beta..aft sch ysd i wnt 2 find him 2 gt bac my umbrella.duno y,my heart aches whn he lked s cold n ws lyk avoiding my eye.m i tt scary?o isit tt u jz cnt face me aft all tt u've done?u're being idiot hir u noe.u're avoiding me.u're running away bcus u dun dare 2 face 2 e problem.stop being a coward lah!u tink u cn avoid 4eva mehx.n wt farking special frenx r u refering 2 me as?idiots arh?o enemies instead?ur msg is lyk evn more cold thn norm frenz can.u tink i duno?i hate tolerating all tis le loh.whn i try 2 b kind n understnading,u take me lyk a fool o sum1 2 step ovr.whn im demanding,u sae im controlling ur lyf.evrytink u nt happy.fark lah!i sick of tis liao cans!okay stop saeing bout tis spoil my mood.i cnt w8 4 sports day!yipee!crap lah thurs haf 2 maths test.a maths e maths all test..wan us die arh.thn aft tt gt e mediacorp tingy until nyt cans.n ysd e choc ws delicious lohduno they blend wt water wid syrups 4 chng yong n mathn tt disgusting choc blended wid water n syrup!i cnt blif hw they cud drink it up lehx.lks lyk ur $$$ were wasted though.lolsargh my dark circles were s obvious!tis few nyts haf nt been slping nicely..well..nth 2 sae lesigning off,manda ♥ hidden inside my heart,i noe u stil exist.u do.
;
11:32 AM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
zzzz..shall fill u on ysd.ysd morning ws raining lyk hell lohx.thn i late 4 sch le 7.35 stil on e bus..=.=s on bus ws chanting lyk shyt askin 4 rain.n guess wt?thks GOD rili gave me my wish.it rained s heavily lohx.n my umbrella!!!its still wid tt guy n he haven return sia.walao thn i run all e wae 2 sch in e rain..drenched frm head 2 toe lahx.i lk s freaking idiotic cans.thn in class nv bring pe shirt s no choice haf 2 change 2 tt disgusting orange colour shirt.=Xthn dragged deb 2 e toilet.haha s funny we found e handryer 2 dry my hair n clothes.lols thn deb n me lyk aunties thr drying e clothes.thn lata diok flu..kp sneezing.zzzn math sry i din hear u lolthn 2dae wake up my eye pain v sticky n dry sia.sort of spoiled my mood lohx.plus i woke up v early de..bt slacked until s late.ws sort of pissed wid myself lah.thn in sch tchr toking my eye lyk gona close liao.e oni class i dare nt slp in is amaths n dnt.amaths cus tchr KP picking on me.boring!!!dnt cus i dowan gt fined.lols ms quek lyk evrytink finefinefine.nv tuck in shirt nv bring nametag all fine.sianxthn recess as usual me n weizhen go downstairs buy food 4 e rest.ok im farking pissed off 2dae u dn cum n gif me tt kinda lk okay.dn nd me TELL u u noe hu u R.thn pon guitar again.i actually wana go de lohx.bt hu ask u 2 seperate those syf 1 n those non syf 1s.i dowan b xtra okay.s nt goin bleahx =piry sry pangseh u many tyms liao..aft sch ate wid wl,jolene,wq,deb,wz,iry n estee thn deb go band,wl go hall duty,za n estee duno go whr left us nia.thn go bbtea shop.niwaes we planning 2 get weilin's prezzie duno whn hu free..cnt w8 4 sports dae!tym is lyk goin s slowly sia..shall stop here.bb im stil wishing u wud cum bac..
;
5:18 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Sunday, March 25, 2007
2dae woke up early go 2 e sort of lucky draw wteva tingy lahx.thn i prepare evrytink le bt lst min nd 2 go toilet thn late thn mummy give me e angry lk 4 e whole journey 2 tt place lohx.thn whn reach liao no1 reach yet.we e earliest cans.sumore mummy gif me e lk n cold shoulder 4 nth i got evn angrier n v fedup liaox.s whn e lady n e gerl gime e ppr i jz snatch it n walk away.mummy gd lah.ask me dun lidat u tell me hw loh.i kena u gime angry lk 4 no reason its nt evn my fault cans=.=rah!!!thn we walked under HIS block..haixthn piggy bro told me he admire sum1..wah interesting!im gona find out hu e unlucky gerl is..=XXX hehe jz came bac frm tuition..quite fun lah n i spotted sum1 thr..n e stupid guys r lyk asking lame questions.had a nightmare ystd lohx.walao fark lah i s damn freaked out by butterflies lah.1 butterfly enuf 2 send me screaming all e wae liaox.thn sumore tt dream is lyk s kuku.urgh.idiotic.duno lehx.im sort of pissed off nwadaes cus papa kp asking me 2 do hw do hw.zzzz bb
;
4:13 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
feeling colourful 2dae,s evrytink's gona b in COLOURS.x))argh!crampcrampcramp 2dae!pain lohx.had 2 get panadol from estee.bt lyk no difference sia..still pain lehx.lolsmy results!nonono i ws e worse in my class lohx.amaths 2/40 fark lah 2 marks oni=.=thn wnt find dnt tcher aft sch.tcher gaf me 2 marks more 38nhalf hahas v happythn aft sch wnt wid wl,wh n iry..lata go bubbletea shop buy bubbletea.hehex cramp stil drink sia luki deb nt thr.opps=Xlata deb kill me.thn while w8tin 4 bus michelle came thn chatchatchat..s as usual hor,mon we'll mit! =DDDlata wnt online n saw sth..dots im nt gona tell u wt.tt idiot claimed it as his.hw dare he put it online!felt lyk strangling him siaystd gt pa n e guys ganged up 2 mess my hair.dots..thks ALOT mans.i rili APPRECIATE it.SIANS.v boring..zzzz
;
7:27 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Sunday, March 18, 2007
i jz feel lyk isolating myself n hide frm evry1 loh.i dowan 2 open my eyes n c any1 liaox.cn ani1 feel e silence in me?!my heart's freezing;im feeling cold.even my attitude IS cold.im stressed up n i vent my anger on evry1.i sux so GET LOST!woke up 2dae n ws in a damn bad mood.shouted at mum n dad.haix i duno wt's happenin 2 me.mood swings?no i dun tink so.its lyk i haven been s emo n temperamental 4 hw long le cans.evn if im bad mood norm i wud tend 2 kp it insid.bt i cnt take it le.thr's s many tings in my mind i feel lyk bursting liaox.its lyk evn a smallsmall ting lyk a fly cud make me soso angry.i feel lyk evrytink i do is wrng.everytink i do is stupid.n wt OTHERS do is correct.im miserable n u're all HAPPY can!arhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!i tot tt tis hols wud help me 2 ease my pain.4get about him.relax.bt wt did i get?im stuck in tuition n homeworks jz bcus im expected 2 do beta.yes i said i wud do beta.bt does it means i haf 2 spend 6hrs on my revision?its totally out of point loh.since pri sch til nw,im alwaes free 2 do wt i wan n thn nw scully lidat.i dun tink u evn understand my feelings loh.thn aun came 2dae n i ws in a super bad mood n wrng tyming she tok 2 me.i heard bt nv rply.thn mummy scold me lah.insid i ws tinkin hw rude i ws.haix i STIL cnt 4gt him.haha im e world's BEST MORON!he's living happily nw n u're suffering.n its al bcus of U URSELF.y did u evn accpt him?u gt tis upon urself.n u let him hurt u again?im s disappionted in u..if thrs anothr turning point in lyf,i'd rather tt i'd nvr walked tis path.n i mean it.really.='(
;
8:44 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
rah!im feeling guilty!
its lyk..no i dun wan tis 2 hapen
bt y mz it b e othr wae round?
im SRY.RILI SRY
haiz totally stressed out liaox.
n 2dae,wnt bugis.
mummy bought a RED belt 4 me.LOL
duno whn im gona wear it.
bt mum said its unique.urghs nvm.
andandand,
im STUCK wid stupid hws n revision 2 do.
thks 2 results.
n yeah im dead.totallydead.
n @ e end of e dae,
WHO'S GONA SAVE ME??!
he din msg 4 2 daes.
n s I took e initiative.
i msged him n asked him hw's evrytink.
i guess i cnt 4gt him.
bt i WIll n i MEAN it!
s stop lking down on me.
i noe im wrng.
i shudnt haf done tis if i wana 4gt him.
bt im trying.at least i did.
haiz im rili disapionted in u AMANDA.
whn u face a prob,
ur idea is 2 run away?
cry on bed?
isolate urself tinking its all a BAD dream?
daydream?
think tt tis lyf is hopeless?
miss him?
GET A MOVE ON!i hate u i hate u ihate u!
CNT U JZ LK AT E REALITY?
he's LEFT u
he DOESNT evn CARES about wt u're thinking.
u SUX u SUX u SUX!
argh JZ LEAVE ME ALONE! :_;
;
4:30 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Monday, March 12, 2007
damn sians loh.stuck at hm nth 2 do..N thanks 2 my DEAR math kor i kena woken up frm my beauty sleep.lols thn wana nap again anothr phone call came >.< sians thn cnt slp liao go wash up n watch cartoons..haha childish sia thn cook my own noodle n drank orange juice thn my whole tongue orange..i ws lyk lking at e mirror LAUGHIN at myself =.= madness sia me.hmms thn lata go outside walkwalk.its lyk..im tinkin of u, bt r u?isit true love if u r evn willing 2 let me go?i guess nt.haix sort of spoiled my mood liaox.thn wnt up plae comp kena scolding by mummy..thn maid bought noodle 4 me.i actually sat thr 4 an hr n half trying 2 FINISH e food.in e end cnt tahan thn stop eating liaox.go nap ;p haha lata grow as fat as pig!jz nw lking through e blogskins n songs actually wanted 2 change de..bt in e end still stuck wid e same skin n song cus i cnt find othr beta 1..oh ya sat wnt out wid zhaowei kor cus feeling dpressed.ahem s he ask me out gt mu di de cans.wan buy wallet 4 sum ger y s secret nehx?make me evn mor wan 2 noe hu sia..oi i dn care hor if e ger dn lyk dn cum n find me can liaox.lols thn we were at e shop whn i saw his frenz he ws thr oso bt wnt sumwhr else..thn aft go watch movie..yay evrytink kor treat i lyk eating his $$$ lol..niwaes thks 4 evrytink horx.thn lata on e bus kor tell me sth sae mz b prepared 4 tt sth if nt i myt nt take it in e end..mayb bahx,bt i noe wt i'll do.=))
;
4:20 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Friday, March 09, 2007
duno y im feelin s depressed evn aft exams liao.i felt sumwhat..empty.yeah n thn ws on e bus 2dae.i ws downryt pissed.okay s damn depressed cans.thn on e bus whn scully tears jz fell.haix i rili duno wt 2 sae.its lyk im s useless.aft crying n listen 2 ppl's advice 4 s lng,im stil stuck at e same place.its rili hard 2 4get.bt whn i tok 2 her on e bus,i realized tt thr r ppl hu felt evn worse thn me.bt she's amazing,she gt ovr it..yep its an achievement.dun tink bout it animore.tis kinda frenx nt worth it.im sure sumwhr around thr will b frenx hu rili care.hahas its nt worth it.rili not.bt i stil wan 2 kp e wonderful memories wid me.its wrng 2 kp holding on 2 e past,bt thr r tyms whn tis memories let u recall n bring bac all e beautiful tyms b4.wt is love?i guess i can nv tell.til nw,i dun noe.dun evn noe if he's hart is stil wid me o jz plain infatuation.it myt oredi bn wid sum1 else.words can nv hold a promise.bt actions do.u dun nd 2 promiz evrytink by words bt by ur actions.i duno wt 2 sae nw,i haf a bad feeling though.it will nv b e same again.he's sort of ignoring me.n insid,i guess i noe e reason.i shudnt hold on.i shudnt hope.sumtyms i feel lyk loving anothr 2 get ovr tis.bt no,its nt ryt.its nt true love.n im nt gona b tt hartless 2 make use of any prsn.n if it fails again,u'd oni get evn more hurt.i've failed 2 tyms ordy.again n again.mayb he had ordy 4gtten e 1st tym we met,e tym whn he promized he'd nv hurt me,e tym he said he ws zhen xin,e tym whn he said he'll nv leave me,n e tym whn he said he'll cherish me.i dun nd 2 blind myself in hope wishing u wud cum bac sumdae.i noe wt u're tinking.u dun nd 2 gif me animor reasons 2 w8 on.dun nd 2 gif me any false hopes.shi jian hui ba quan bu de shi biao xian chu lai.ta yi jing rang wo zhi dao zhen zen de ni.wo bu yong zai sha sha de deng le.zhong you yi tian,xiang xing hui zao dao zhen zen de ai..
;
6:32 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
zzZZzz..hahas 2dae woke up thn realize i haven study my emaths.die!bt nvm at least i felt i knew hw 2 do MORE thn e previous tym..wah sianx i tink mz find tuition liaox.DOWAN!urgh actually im okay if they dun gif hw.cus i
CONFIRM wun do de..hehex.my chi lyk shyt lah i spent 2 much tym on e 1st section thn 2nd section which is
MUCH more important & holds
MORE marks i cnt finish.kukuhead sia me.i oni realized whn about ten mins 2 finish.gime more stress nia.nvm i tis tym dun do well,nxt tym will be more motivated.=)) hahas thn 2dae hyper sia.arh stop saeing bout tt incident!its not true,it cnt b true.no,i
DOWAN it 2 be true!bt i feel guilty sia..v pian xin.lols.n thn chi lsn i kp toking n toking,n wq cnt concerntrade.mu biao da dao!haha i purposely de.duno y i 2dae feel deb super quiet.hmms she studying lah.wq dun cum wid e ultimate cuteness tingy again hor.lols 2mr dnt thn fri super stress gt comb science plus amaths.yesh gona finish exams liao!thn
HOLS le..i gona slack n hm n hang out.jz nw jo n me talked n thn came 2 1 of e sensitive topics.yup ermx.duno hw 2 sae lah.jz cn sae,im nt strong lahx.jz able 2 control my mindset.niwaes ur mind is e most powerful system mah.ur mind die u die.lols yup n thks god i oni nd 2 take few daes 2 get ovr.hehex.since young,i oni haf 1 goal in life which is 2 live happily.s perhaps tts y im able 2 tink pos evn whn tings go wrng..or u cn sae i v bo chap 2 evrytink lyk larry sae lohx.hahas i dun tink bout wt im goin 2 do in future or wt r my standards.as lng as im happy doing wt i wan.=D okay lahx,gona study liaox.byebye!
;
7:57 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Monday, March 05, 2007
2dae gt eng thn geog n ss 2gt.hahas duno wt i doing.e eng ppr i writewritewrite thn in e end duno wt i writing..nvm jz leave it loh.lols thn e humanities ppr.arhhh!i lk at e ss qstn n my mind ws lyk..blank 4 ten mins can.thn aft tt i realized i haven started n chiong..sumore e ppr oni 1hr sia..diedie!hahas i 4gt evrytink s write alot of crap all i tink out de..thn poor wq e geog ppr mingming shi coniferous forest let her c until mangrove sia.wt pineapple lohx.its cone shape lehx..wah make until i feel lyk bursting out laffin until i c her sadsad face.lols nvm nxt tym u c a picture mz put it ryt in frnt of ur eyes 2 c liaox.evry detail mz c carefully..muahahaha evil sia.=X walao recess crap loh.wnt 2 general office thn kena caught.thn v pissed sia my fingernail is quite ok de nt lng lohx.ryt sid can kp lng cus guitar mahx.mei ci gen wo zuo dui.wo gou suay loh.kena caught hw many tyms n u kp saeing my poor innocent nails..thn took my nametag.hahas thn wnt bac 2 class thn realize nt oni me wz n pris oso kena nametag taken away.thn decided go find her 2gt aft sch.wah cnt imagine if she noe we all frm sm class she sure complain 2 tcher de..luki nv.hmms thn e eng oral.haha s luki sia i din evn study o tink about e qstn im supposed 2 prepare 4 evn though i asked 4 e qstn n had it wid me.thn scully tcher call me i diok shock.thn took wq's ppr.thn lata she check e name gt wq's name thn she ask me hw cum gt 2 amanda.LOL.thn start le she ask me i direct ans sia.nt evn prepared lehx.luki my mind work fast i toktoktok all i tink of.haha thn gt 12/16.yay!XD thn aft tt assembly liaox.duno wt they toking sia i DUN EVEN understand ANITH.i ws lyk huh wt polytenic?huh wt chemical wt?lols thn assembly finish liaox go find tcher..haix i guess i in her blacklisted students liao she rmb my name e othrs she duno.sad sia thn find wq n deb thn we go eat thn jo n sakshi came thn go hm liao..drink coffee again.ahh y tt sum1 mz cum n make me s ps.e sec1's ting is lyk s damn embarrassing cans.although ovr liaox i stil cnt 4gt it.n blif it o nt STILL gt ppl making fun of me.haix.gimme trouble niax.shooshooshoo!>.<
;
5:01 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Sunday, March 04, 2007
its been quite sum tym since i had tasted a marshmallow as swit as tis..yumyum.hehex all tis while i've been under alot of pressure,stress.i nv had a real laf since s many tings happen.its rili sort of sapping all my energy away.exams cuming bt im sort of unprepared.isit rili unprepared or m i jz tinking tt wae?styms whn tings go wrng,i start 2 tink negatively.perhaps most ppl wud sae tt its wrng 2 tink tt wae cus it wud oni leave u wid no hope.bt 4 me,tings wud seem beta.cus whn i tink negatively n instead tings get beta,i feel gd.it makes me feel lyk im achieving evrytink in d small wae.i do admit i feel lonely at tyms.searching 4 love tt i tink is missing in my lyf.i tink tt in tis lyf im alone.no 1 cares 4 me.no 1 loves me.it makes me feel tt im awaes left out.perhaps tts y i duno hw 2 appreciate tings around me.n whn evrytink fails in e end,my mindset is,its e end..i bear grudge,i hate,n nvr 4gif.i've been trapping myself in tis world 4 yrs to cum.since young,i felt v unfair.i ws e 1 alwaes bein bullied.i hate myself 4 bein s useless.i hate myself 4 nt being able 2 do anith.n e incident tt left me wid a huge wound 4eva.i ws betrayed by my own classmates.n given a public scolding n whacking by mum.i duno if they've any idea hw much hurt they've inflicted in me.bt i blif in retribution.it will go bac 2 them.since thn,i've trapped myself in tis world of darkness.i nv opened up.n i nv trusted mum again.i hated her 4 nt trustin me.nor did i trusted her wid my probs again.bt as i grow up,i realiz she ws e one hu rili cared 4 me.i regreted treating her s coldly.mayb i shud jz let tings go.mum didnt noe wt happened tt tym.she ws worried n angry.n i nv tried 2 let her understand my feelings.s whn 1 dae i ws argueing wid her,i shouted tt she din care 4 me,she din trust me o luved me b4.i told her tt i've nvr 4gave her since e p1 incident.it left her in tears.it ws e 1st tym i made mum cry.i felt s guilty.im sry.its my fault.i felt s selfish.its whn i started realizing tt i hurt ppl w/o knowing.n i tried.i tried tinkin of ppl's feelings.i cnt b selfish animore.mum myt haf 4gotten tis incident.bt it wil stay 4eva in my heart.and as i realize she is getting older each dae,i wana give her a hug n tell her hw much she mean 2 me n thks her 4 s much she'v done.i love u mum.=D
;
1:32 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Saturday, March 03, 2007
ystd our 3rd mth le..bt its wnt we decided to end evrytink.its sort of hard 4 me 2 accept.bt i haf 2 move on..i realized wt it means whn u sae tt its oni 4 sum1 u rili luv tt u'll cry 4 them.yup i cried ystd nyt.n i ws out wid mummy daddy n bro.i told her about it.i tink dad oso guessed wt happen liao.i expect them 2 scold me,lecture me 4 getting into tis kind of relationship probs.bt no,they din.instead,mom talked 2 me e whole nyt.she told me tt no mata wt happens,i haf 2 b strong.i mz learn to overcome tis n dun repeat e same mistake again.we chatted vry long.n tts whn i realized sumwhr around me,thr r ppl hu care.they r alwaes thr 4 me,supporting me.like deb,larry,wq,sakshi my family n frenz.i ws stubborn ystd.sort of wnt mad whn i tried to control my tears.bt it jz flowed naturally.i guess i'll jz haf 2 cry it all out.deb practically shouted evrytink in2 my head.he scolded me 2.he said he ws angry cus i jz refused 2 moved on.n whn he said tt he haf no feelings 4 me animore,i finally woke up.mayb sumtyms its ryt 2 shout at me.its oni thn i will realiz my mistake.i din noe wt 2 rply at tt tym.i ws v hurt.v sad.e dae b4 ystd,i ws spending tym folding straw harts wid e intention of giving it 2 him.it took me e whole nyt b4 i finished e whole lot of straws.sumore i ws stuck wid e group project work n vocab test.bt nw i guess i'll jz throw it away.its no use hanging on.n if one day u happen 2 read tis,i dowan u 2 blame urself..i've 4given u.u shud learn 2 4gif urself.pls dun blame urself.stop hating urself.stop saeing tt u cnt accept urself animore.mayb we're nt fated 2 b 2gt.like wt u said,if we r,we'll mit again.thr's owaes a glimspe of hope whn u kp hoping.sumtyms,u jz haf 2 accept e fact whn its gone.i dowan 2 haf any sibling relationship 2 do wid u cus it wud oni bring back painful memories.im sry 4 being selfish.i cnt slp ystd.whn i finally slp at 12sth,i woke up at 1+,thn 4+,thn 6+..i off my hp bcus i dun wana listen animore.bt whn i finally took up e courage to on my hp n read ur msg,i guess i felt beta.thks 4 evrytink.i will learn 2 let go wid e wonderful memories u left me.i will learn 2 let go n at least i noe we still lyk each other..im living in e bitterswit world nw.i wan peace n quiet.i wan 2 sort out my tots.i nd tym 2 get over.i may nt b strong nw.bt i will grow stronger in future.at least i haf tis strong willpower 2 live on.i nv blifed tt lyf is w/o hope.its jz part n parcel of lyf.n whether u r willing 2 let go.its ovr.im gona cry.im gona cry it all out.im gona let it go.im gona live on..
;
10:01 AM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u
Friday, March 02, 2007
hahaha!i muz b e world stupidest moron around..nw tt its heading ryt to e rocks tt i finally realized my mistake..2 put it harshly,i duno hw 2 love.n in a relationship,e 2 ppl mz b e ones who each take initiative 4 it 2 work.bt 4 me,no.i left him 2 take all e initiative n i guess nw he's tired n sick of it liao.whneva we go out,he will b e one asking me out.wheneva we msg,mostly its he who msg.whneva we tok on e phone,its he who call.wt am i doing?slping lyk slping beauty w8ting 4 him to do evrytink.im stubborn.totally stubborn.n i guess tts y nw he'e tired n avoiding liao.even if i wan 2 try to save e situation..its 2 late isnt it?i wan it 2 b e same again bt is he willing to take tis risk again?its nt e 1st tym its happening..e lst tym it happened n he tried to sae out wt he tink,i ws ignorant to it.he said e same ting kp happening n he's sort of tired of it liao.s sumtym mz quarral.bt no,its nt tis meaning.he jz duno hw 2 put it..in e end, its still boils down tt both of us mz take turns 2 take initiative.its lyk tis isnt it?n nw,happily 4 myself,i ws e 1 hu sen it heading ryt to e rocks.its 2 late le..our 3rd mth 2dae bt he's still avoiding me..im sry..its my fault.if u wan 2 end it,i wun blame u le..mayb if i had realized my mistake earlier,it wudnt haf happened.bt nw..i guess its over.
;
6:00 PM
***
our story;
sweet memories begin.. <33
17o05o07
words cud nvr tell hw deep i feel 4 u